Not at my frontdoor!

Kill slowly

Maybe in 1 occasion torture might be allowed,... and that's for those losers wasting my time and their time and our time with their crap spam. Nothing better to do???


From The Desk of Mr Ahmed Al Sultan.
Branch Manager National Bank of Abu Dhabi Al Ain Branch Ali Ibn Abi Talib St, Near Oud Al Tawba Roundabout,United Arab Emirates U.A .E
Email: ahmed.nbd21@gmail.com

Good day Friend,

I am pleased to get across to you with a very urgent and profitable business proposal. I got your e-mail address on the Internet while browsing and after that, i decided to contact you and ask for your assistance in this urgent matter that requires trust and confidentiality. I am Mr Ahmed Al Sultan, Branch manager, National Bank of Abu Dhabi Al Ain Branch Ali Ibn Abi Talib St, Near Oud Al Tawba Roundabout (UNITED ARAB EMIRATES), Married with four Kids.

I am writing this proposal to ask for your support and cooperation to carry out this deal opportunity in my department. On June 6, 1999, an America Oil consultant/contractor with Petroleum Corporation, Mr Thomas Stone, made a numbered time (fixed) deposit for twelve calendar months, Valued at US$12,000,000.00 (Twelve Million United State Dollars in my branch upon maturity. I sent a routine notification to his forwarding address but got no reply. After a month, we sent a reminder and finally we discovered from his contract employers, the Petroleum Corporation that Mr Thomas Stone, died in the plane crash On October 31, 1999, ( an Egyptian Boeing 767 Flight 990 ) with other passengers on board as you can confirm it yourself via the website below.

http://www.cbsnews.com/stories/1999/11/01/iran/main49778.shtml

Most astonishing of my discovery was that, all records bear no next of kin, meaning no member of Mr Thomas Stone, family knows about the deposit therefore, no member of his family will ever come forward to claim the money, in order for the bank not to transfer the said sum of Twelve Million United State Dollars ($12,000,000.00) as unclaimed funds to the emirates treasury account, the above stated funds most be claimed immediately by somebody standing in as late Mr Thomas Stone.

Next of Kin, According to (UNITED ARAB EMIRATES LAW), at the expiration of 12 (Twelve) years, the money will be revert to the ownership of the (UNITED ARAB EMIRATES) Government if nobody applies to claim the fund. This revelation is only known to me because i was his personal account officer before i was posted to become the branch manager, now i seek your cooperation to act as next of kin to late Mr Thomas Stone, to claim the funds and move them into useful investments, we shall split the cash between our self upon the confirmation of the money into your Bank account. I am ready to offer you 35% of the total fund and 60% for me while 5% will be set aside for any expenses that might be incurred during the transaction.

Please note that by virtue of my position in the bank, i have worked out perfect modality as well as i shall provide the relevant information's and documents for the successful claiming and transfer of the funds into the account that will be provided by you. I cannot stand in the forefront of this transaction because i work with the bank ,that is why i have come to you for assistance, be rest assured that this deal involves no risk , upon the receiving of your acceptance mail . I will like you to provide me with the following details, to my private email address: ( ahmed.nbd21@gmail.com )


(1) Your Valid Direct Tel/ Mobile/Fax Number.
(2) Your Full Name:
(3) Current Resident Address.
(4) Your Private E-mail Address.
(5) Your Occupation:
(6) Your Age and Sex:
(7) Your Nationality:


Then i shall furnish you with due process of concluding this transaction without any delay. please discard this message if you are not interested. One Passionate appeal, i will make to you is not to discuss this matter with anybody, if you have any reasons to reject this offer, please and please destroy this message as any Leakage of this information will be too bad for me at my work place as the Branch Manager National Bank of Abu Dhabi, here in U.A.E.

Thanks for your kind understanding.

Mr Ahmed Al Sultan.
Branch Manager National Bank of Abu Dhabi Al Ain Branch Ali Ibn Abi Talib St, Near Oud Al Tawba Roundabout, United Arab Emirates U.A .E

Zapiro

Like an annual rendez-vous. And on time like a Swedish train.

The new Zapiro cartoon end-of-year collection is about to hit the bookstores. There are some launches in Jozi and Cape Town in coming days.

Tabloid rugby

Drugs and sex. SA rugby is in the news! It's like a Nollywood and/or tabloid version of Invictus. Istead of heroism and national pride, it's dope, hitmen and love triangles.

Juicy stuff. Players sent home for taking banned substances (knowingly or not), and then a mother sends out a Nigerian hitsquad to take out a Blue Bulls youngster who is having a relationship with the daughter. A movie scriptwriter could not have come up with a better blockbuster. And on top of that the Bokke lost against Scotland.

What's next before the game against England? A secret love child? Indian gambling syndicate now targetting rugby? Bokke player with poker addiction? Blue Bulls orgies? Sharks' nightclub brawl?

Breaking News (not)

Here we were. Simple but nice pasta lunch in Melville. Mobile phone gives the sound related to an incoming SMS.

It's a Breaking News message from Eye Witness News. One of those you open right away. But to my big surprise it's a message that British heir to the thrown (or what's left of it) William will marry his girlfriend Kate in 2011.

Now since when is that breaking news for people here in South Africa? Are we still royal subjects? Just don't get it honestly... It is an insult to real breaking, important news to have this announcement as a sms-newsalert.

Naked ban

Trends come and go faster than eating a Mac burger (euh...), and some create more waves than others.

Apparently in China the new trend for young married couples is to have nude wedding pictures taken. But now an association of wedding protographers in China are calling for a ban on naked newly weds. They just can't concentrate anymore...

And in good Chinese tradition there is a serious threat to the naked newly weds. If they would spread their wedding album for instance via the web they could face charges of spreading pronography.

So don't throw that tux away yet...

...Was

Gone again. Like an eagle on Red Bull. Like a bullet from a 9mm. Like the Gautrain on full speed. The week that was. Somebody urgently need to slow down this thundering train. Kill the pilot!

Juju and twitter remain the joke of the year. You can't even explain it to people in Europe or the US or Indonesia.... The future leader of the Rainbow Nation in need of some medication to come back to reality. Oeps,... I'll probably be called an anti-revolutionary now!

Obama in Asia. JZ too. Ray Davies never stops. New Vusi album soon. Banyana Banyana. It seems some teams think Eq. Guinea fielded some men in their female football team. Should be easy to check... NYC. GoSS. Brooklyn in Pretoria. ATM that doesn't work. Lenasia. PVR issues. Man dies on SAA flight from Jozi to Kaapstad. Past & Present. New Brusselmans. New Peter Harris. 7 Hours in Nairobi. Lions, elephants and gorillas. Liverpool FC. Soweto derby today. Soweto marathon last Sunday. Joao still in DC. Joburg city billing system still a galaxy away from being like a "world class city". Solar energy. New anti-drunk-driving car-tool in Belgium. If you've been caught drunk driving once you will need to install a breath-tester in your car. That tester is linked to you ignition. You gotta blow first before you can turn the key. If too much booze, the engine wont start. Smart!

Ray & Lola

Londoner Raymond Douglas Davies - aka Ray Davies - is an old chap. Born in 1944 and kicked to fame with rockers The Kinks.

He just released an album of Kinks classics recorded with friends like Bruce Springsteen, Bon Jovi,...

Just heard the surprising re-take of The Kinks' supersong Lola with guest vocals by Paloma Faith. At first listen you might go "No man....", but re-takes are not there to be carboncopies of the original (that fails 99.99999999999% of the time) but a creative and original approach to a classic. And this is what Ray and Paloma did with Lola.

And thus, as they say, find Ray Davies' album See My Friends in a recordstore near you,.... or on the net.

Apocalypse Now

It's the season of thunder and lighting in Jozi, but Radio 702 went a bit too far this morning. The way they made the expected downpour the leadstory at 7am, sounded like the apocalypse was about to happen within minutes. The end of the world as we know it. Darkness descends forever. Armageddon awaits. Say your final prayers!

Probably some Jehovah witnesses were all in a high (sorry folks!), but it was just another rainy moment. Nothing more, nothing less. Townships weren't swept away by the apocalyptic storm. Eskom survived the drops from the sky. Nobody - as far as I know - got stuck under a fallen tree because of gusting winds. So why this mad newsreports about the pending disasters from the sky?

Take a deep breath and smell the fresh air.

Back

Guess who's back?

Yesterday Liverpool's Fernando Torres gave us some flashbacks of what he was and could be again. Two goals by the Spanish striker sent Chelsea back to London empty-handed. It was the good old Torres again. The deadly striker! The magic touch. The speed, the hunger, the vision.

Sorry Chelsea lads, but Torres decided to bring back the best of himself just as Chelsea was coming to Anfield.

Fingers crossed now that Fernando keeps up the magic. Once again.

Terminated

Tuesday's election day in the US marks the end of an era in its richest State.

Republican Arnold Schwarzenegger is packing his bags. No more governor. End of term. And on top of that the Republicans lost California to Democrat governor-candidate Jerry Brown. At least some good news for the Democrats amidst the avalanche of Republican victory in the US Congress.

The Terminator terminated. Will be back,.... or will be back no more?

Wonder how his wife feels about it as she has Democrat blood running through her veins as she is part of the Kennedy dynasty. Maybe Arnold will go back to Hollywood for a movie about his governorship. From Conan to Terminator to Governor. All in a bodybuilder’s life. The 'true' story of a pile of muscles. In a cinema near you soon! Asta la vista baby.

Tweeting Julius

The fight is on!!! Julius vs Twitter.

It seems that the almighty ANC Youth League is aiming for full web control. Global control! They have enough of Twitter and want it closed. Now. Right away. Basta!

They say there are just too many Malema impersonators on Twitter and thus it needs to be closed. Pull the plug! There can only be one JM and that is the real dude!

The ANC YL said they will go the the cops to close this evil thing down. Wow, they really have faith in the kick ass powers of the SAPS! Should we bet on this??

South

European birds are heading south as winter is moving in up there.

The Zuma show

The week (incl. weekend) that was.

Halloween seems a growing US export product. Zuma sends some packing and contacts the printers for new biz cards for others. The Sharks rule in their tank. Magic touch from Torres lifts Liverpool's spirits. The Tea Party is the talk of the town across the US of A. Lions in the Free State. Mandela at the Market Theatre. UPS and its explosive content. 1Time and its evacuation. Brazil gets first female president (they always seem a step ahead of us). To confuse us all, Europe changed their clocks last weekend and the US will do the same next weekend. Eish! Joao Silva is in DC. We wish him strength. Herschelle Gibbs is stepping on some toes. Has Vavi become an informal sushi promoter? Cuz any publicity is good publicity.... And the SABC keeps slipping up and delivering us more 'surprises'. Yesterday, less than 2 hours after Zuma's major cabinet reshuffle, SABC3's 7pm English bulletin started with the line that El Presidente changed his team,... but then the newsanchor said "We'll come back to that story a bit later". Wow. How to ridiculize yourself on a major local news day! Double eish!